Subject: Lie Clocks



A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly
Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those
clocks?"
St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock.
Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."
"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?""
That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never
told a lie."
"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"
St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved
twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's Hilary Clinton's clock?" asked the man. "Hilary's clock is in Jesus'
office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."

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compassionate conservatism, for many Americans, being free from the government is
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Lol, but why is this in religion and politics?

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Trust me, I'm a socialist!

There's power in a factory,power in the land, power in the hand of the worker. But it all amounts to nothing if together we don't stand, there is power in a union.
The union forever defending our rights, down with the blackleg, workers unite. To our brothers and our sisters in many far off lands, there is power in a union.
Money speaks for money, the devil for his own. - Billy Bragg

It took me a few seconds to get the ceiling fan part.

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"I find no black men appealing, they look like giant monkeys." -LilithIshtar (some member of another forum I used to be part of)

A shabby looking young man wearing a Rangers shirt knocks on the pearly gates and asks to be let in. Saint Peter says "I don't know. Have you ever done anything good like given money to the poor?"
"No." replied the Hun"Helped a widow or orphan?"
"No." replied the Hun
"Helped a little old lady across a street?"
"No." replied the Hun
"Well then, why should I let you in?"
"I did do something very brave once." Said the Hun
"And what was that?" asked Peter
"I went to Parkhead to see an Old Firm game and stood in the stands with the Tims decked in full Rangers gear."
"My, that is brave!. When did you do that?"
"About 3 minutes ago..."

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"We will disobey your laws as long as they are unjust and they make a world shaped only for your profit"-G8 protestor Genoa 2001





NO PASERÁN!!

"We learned a long time ago that we should never subject ourselves to the schedules of the powerful. We had to follow our own calendar and impose it on those above.” - Subcommandante Marcos

Lol

__________________
Trust me, I'm a socialist!

There's power in a factory,power in the land, power in the hand of the worker. But it all amounts to nothing if together we don't stand, there is power in a union.
The union forever defending our rights, down with the blackleg, workers unite. To our brothers and our sisters in many far off lands, there is power in a union.
Money speaks for money, the devil for his own. - Billy Bragg

Gee whiz guys, I started a Joke Contest thread in "Anything But Politics." It needs to be bumped back up to page one with a few new good jokes.

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